I have this terrible compulsion. It isn’t just a strange habit or odd behaviour. I can’t help it. At least, I don’t think I can.

I wink. That’s it. That is my problem.

Now, you might think a wink is a wink is a wink. But you would be wrong. There are several different types.

• simple wink - where one eye squeezes shut while the other remains open.
• a keyboard wink - as in the emoticon type
• double wink (”wink wink”) - to imply that what was just said should not be taken at face value
• a flirty wink - exchanged between an interested party and their object of affection
• two eye wink - winking with both eyes at the same time…sorry to disappoint you, but this is not a wink at all. It is, in fact, a blink.

My problem is with the simple wink. Instead of the field of dreams, I have the horrible, winking left eye. Initially, that doesn’t seem so bad. A bit of a throwback to the 1950’s. But I am also the girl who loves aprons and black & white movies. So the 1950s are not terribly out of line.

The compulsion occurs when I read something like, “Harry caught sight of Seamus’s eye and Seamus winked. Snape, however, was not pleased.” If I read it, I must wink. In Harry Potter, a biography of Cary Grant, textbooks on the anatomy of the eye, anything. It’s involuntary and usually followed by an exclamation of frustration because I can’t believe I have done it again.

I have researched it (winking the whole way) to find out if I am alone in my plight. But there is nothing. No fancy medical term. No support group. No explanation.

I guess it is just part of what makes me uniquely me.